I have always seen myself as a happy-go-lucky, optimistic, simple kind of person. Other than loving to spend $$ and the bimbotic urge to look pretty all the time, I don't ask for much in life. Yup sure, I love $$ and love branded goods, but if I can't afford it with my salary, I am not the sort to start blaming my parents for not being rich, or my husband for not making enough. I just deal with it and don't buy them.
Being really dissatisfied with my previous job, I finally took the big step and QUIT after 3 years of talking about it. Reasons why I didn't quit earlier? Financial stability! Clear future! Iron rice bowl! Hahaha very cliche but very true… Nope, it's not that the job was too challenging/ my boss sucked (in fact, my last boss IS the boss I respect the most, out of 3 others I had). I just wasn't doing what I like and want to do.
So what do I want to do? I want to be a makeup artist/ visual merchandiser (fashion, beauty). The sad thing is, I only realise what I want at the age of 29, and I don't have the qualifications. I don't have a degree in art, or even a diploma in merchandising. I can't take up masters (I need art!), or a 3-year course in Temasek Polytechnic, or go back to HK to take up some part time courses (can't find a relevant one in Singapore). I have a husband, and mortgage to worry about.
Just spoke to my uncle last week, who happens to be a visual merchandiser, and I realise how silly and ignorant I am. I know nothing! I know nothing about Art, or anything about visual merchandising. So if someone asks me to conceptualise the window/store display for, let's say, a German brand, what do I know about Germany to design an appropriate look for the store?? Nothing!
So my uncle said, that's because I don't read, so I don't have ideas, therefore not creative. Shame, shame on me!! Right on spot ~ sigh…
However, he said that it's never too late, and advised me to go for my professional makeup course, at the same time start noticing things around me, and write down notes everyday about what I see. Why do certain stores look great, and why some don't. Also, start learning programs like Photoshop, Indesign etc etc. I told him I knew a little bit of Photoshop, and he replied me promptly that 'a little bit means you don't know how to use it'. Ouch! But… so true :) Create a portfolio, and go look for a job, if I realise that visual merchandising is what I want really, as compared to being a makeup artist.
I am grateful for his advice. Really!
But… am I going to make it as a visual merchandiser? At this age? To be honest, doing makeup is my passion, and I just so love to share the joy of looking good with others. Visual merchandising is something I am interested in, but it is too late for me to start? Am I smart enough?
On the other hand, my husband feels that it is better for me to become a visual merchandiser, as he thinks that being a makeup artist is not something I can do till I am like, 62. I also promised him a kid before I turn 32… what if it takes me long to learn the craft and I am offered a VM job, but it is also time for me to give him a kid…? ARGH!!!
In summary,
Makeup artist - my passion, but filled with uncertainties and financial instability (at least the 1st few years), not something I can do till I retire
Visual merchandiser - interest, more prospects, but not sure whether I will make it
This is how I feel for the past few days…
http://roarlions.blogspot.com/2009/10/at-crossroads.html
Never knew a person like me would reach this point in my life!!
But then again… no point regretting choices I have made in my younger days (like going down the safe route and enroll in JC and NUS, studying something I had and have no interest in). Just go for that makeup course and learn something!! Learn Photoshop, Indesign and what not and treat it as an extra skill if I don't become a VM!!!
Am I thinking that things are too simple… again??
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